Death Row prisoners in particular are mostly very
needy and will quickly come to rely on your letters.
> Having a friend to care about them can make a huge difference to a condemned person's life.
* Many people worry that their letters may not be interesting or exciting enough, but this is not necessary. Your friend has probably been locked away from the world for some time - many Death Row prisoners never see a tree or a
blade of grass. Little things that may seem unimportant to you will bring your
friend a lot of pleasure. His/her only way of taking part in life is through you
- you will act as his/her eyes and ears and every little detail of ordinary everyday life will be greatly enjoyed.
* When a person suddenly stops writing for no apparent reason, it can devastating to someone who has so little to begin with. If you feel you have not 'clicked' with your new friend and you really don't want to continue writing, please drop them a short note to explain this. Failure to do this will leave
them believing it is their fault and that they have done something wrong. (Before you decide this you might want to give them a chance. No relationship is perfect overnight)
* If you fail to hear from your friend for a while, do not take it as personal rejection. Death Row prisoners live in an extremely cold, harsh environment where they regularly sink into depression. Many have mental problems
or personality disorders. Try to send regular weekly mail, even if only a card or note, to let them know you are thinking of them.
* Some Death Row prisoners become attached to their penfriends very quickly;
they may even fall in love with you. If you are offering friendship only, it is
best to make this clear at the beginning. This avoids misunderstandings and hurt feelings later on.
* Some prisoners may make requests for financial assistance. Remember, you are not under any obligation to send money. Be kind but firm - explain that you
are offering friendship and moral support, not money. Most prisoners will accept this and not ask again.Inmates that have no family support may not have stamps & envelpoes to write often. Stamps and envelopes are really appreciated by all inmates and cost you very little.
*I do not advise asking questions concerning the alleged crime, especially not in your first letter.(Not Only Death Row but all inmates.) This is a very personal matter and should be left for
your friend to tell you in his/her own time.
Some will tell you in the very first letter; some will tell you when they get
to know you better and others will never tell you.
Please bear in mind that many prisoners are appealing their convictions in
court and are advised by their legal team not to discuss the case.
The majority of Death Row prisoners will, at some point, receive an
execution date. This can be a very harrowing time, both for them and for you and
you should not hesitate to seek support if you need it.
Above all else, please remember these people are human beings and deserve
to be treated as such. They will appreciate openness, honesty and sincerity
every bit as much as you do.
In most cases, you will be rewarded with a wonderful, worthwhile friendship
that will make a huge impact on your life.
> These men and women are living in a dark, cold world that is completely
different to ours - if your friend sometimes becomes irrational, please try to
be patient and understanding. Always remember, your letters of friendship and
support will make an enormous difference to your friend's quality of life and
can sometimes be his/her only way of measuring his or her value as a human
being.
>
> *** Rules on what can be sent in via mail vary from state to state, but ALL
capital prisoners are extremely restricted in what they are permitted to have.
PLEASE CHECK WITH YOUR FRIEND FIRST, BEFORE SENDING ANYTHING IN.
> As a general rule, most prisoners are permitted the following items:
LETTERS. Must always include your name and return address.
GREETINGS CARDS. No musical cards. No thick padded cards that are impossible
to search. 8 x 10 maximum size envelope.
PICTURE POSTCARDS. It is advisable to write the prisoner's name and DOC number
on the back of the card in ink.
PHOTOGRAPHS. Not Polaroid.
Thankyou for caring about the men and women on Death Row.
